40 years old knight, the great hero, saver of maidens, defeater of evil. While saving the queen from a burning stake, he killed 2 Gawain’s borthers, also knights of the Round Table. 

Pagan
Your foster mother was Lady of Lake. The new god might be coming but you will remain faithful to the old one.

“Man has to do what is right. Protect weaker. Honor his king and superiors. But the love burns every inch of my body. Is there no way for me to be happy and honorable at the same time?”

You don’t remember much from your childhood. Only flashes of the faces of your mother and father. Truly, the first thing you remember clearly is playing with the wooden soldiers in the city under the water. Soon, you replaced wooden soldiers with wooden swords and wooden swords with metal ones. Your foster mother saw to it. Her name was Vivian – Lady of the Lake. She raised you to be strong and proud. 

She truly loved you and was a great mother to you. She was taking care of you with the support of her human servant, Seraide. She left for a few years and came back when you were fifteen, accompanied by two boys who – as you learned – were your brothers Bors and Lionel. Then, you learned the truth about your history. Your father was king Ban of Benoic, but he was attacked and killed by the Saxon king Claudas. You were 5 years old at the time. Claudas married your mother and raised Bors and Lionel but you had disappeared – Viviana saved you. Why? She never told you.

Your mother died when she gave birth to Claudas’ second son – Claudin. Bors and Lionel had been raised as servants of Claudas’ son Doris, but they killed him in an argument. They would be punished, but fortunately Seraide – who had been working as a maid for several years at Claudas court already – saved them and brought them to Viviana. Soon after, a new kid appeared in the underwater kingdom. Mordred. He hated Bors and Lionel and was keeping afar of you as well. He kept telling you he is a son of King Arthur. Soon, Viviana sent him away.

When you were 18, you traveled together to the court of King Arthur where you had become Knights of the Round Table.

You admired Arthur’s strength, courage, and wisdom, but at the same time, your heart was ripped open, because you immediately fell in love with his wife, Guinevere. For a time, you were avoiding her. You fought in Arthur’s wars, stopped the army of King’s Galeholt, and impressed him so much promised an eternal friendship to you, and subordination to King Arthur. 

Both Galeholt and Viviana promised to help you to get Guinevere. You don’t know what they did but you know that one day Guinevere took you to bed.

So in love, but burden by guilt, you traveled the country as much as possible, searching for adventures, saving many ladies in distress, but remaining faithful to Guinevere.

Until you traveled with Dinadan (a very funny knight who was refusing to fight) and reached a Corbenic. The King of Corbenic welcomed you and asked for help: his daughter Elaine had been cursed by evil witch Morgana who envied to princess her beauty. Elaine had been trapped in the boiling water. Viviana equipped you with many magical amulets so you weren’t afraid to jump into the water, save the naked princess and wake her from the magical sleep with a kiss. But when she wanted you to become her husband, you refuse.

Yet the next evening, you got horribly drunk. The page who was serving you drinks was Mordred again – obviously, he resettled to Corbenic.

You woke up the next Morning next to Elaine, naked, without a clue what happened. You got enraged because you had been sure she deceived you, and you left the castle immediately, not even waiting for Dinadan, who had to chase you in the forest. 

One year later, you received a letter from Elaine that you have a son named Galahad, but before you could visit him, something happened. Arthur accused Guinevere of being an imposter. Your queen had been sentenced to death. Since law betrayed her, you took the armor and charged the execution side, with the support of Hector, your brother Bors, and Balin Ill-Fated. While saving Guinevere, you killed everybody who tried to stop you. Sadly, Gawain’s brothers had been amongst them. You liked them and had been deadly sorry to learn you killed them in the battle frenzy, but you couldn’t take it back. 

For two years, you had been protecting the queen in the castle of Balin Ill-Fated, greatly supported by the army of King Galeholt who waged a war with Arthur to support you in the North.  It was the weirdest time in your life – on one side full of love and sex, on the other side full of guilt that you are rebelling against your king, and at the end, there was also a lot of desperation – many good men died so Guinevere could live, empty storehouse, hunger, weakness, argues with Guinevere… 

When Arthur offered Guinevere mercy, you were ready to accept immediately, even though you thought the King would demand your head. He didn’t. He even accepted you back. But it has never been the same… even though you were still meeting Guinevere and you continued with your treason. 

Trying to run away from your shame, you traveled even more than before. You visited Corbenic and saw your little son and the feeling of guilt overwhelmed you so much you immediately ran away. As much as you couldn’t be with Guinevere, you couldn’t imagine leaving her and becoming Elaine’s husband and raising a son with her. You also felt responsible. Yet you have no clue how to be a father. No one ever showed you how it is done! So you strike a deal with Elaine’s father – you will be paying a generous yearly rent to Corbenic if this situation will never come to haunt him. 

Then Claudas kidnapped Guinevere’s cousin and Arthur declared war on him. You led the army and in two years, you successfully chased the Claudas out of Benoic. Your oldest brother Lionel became the king of Benoic. 

Then Galahad, only fifteen years old, came to the court, proclaimed he is your son, and demanded to be knighted. Arthur told him he has to face the knight in the battle and Galahad chose you. He was good but young, inexperienced, and you could easily defeat him. Instead of that, you let him humiliate you in front of the eyes of the whole court. He was your son. You wanted happiness for him. If he wants to be a knight, he should be a knight. (Compare with the blueprint Quest of Holy Grail.) 

Soon after, the Quest of Holy Grail began. After two years of traveling, you reached nothing. Until one day, when you have been completely lost in the forest and you rested next to the cave blocked by a huge boulder, you heard a cry from the other side. You moved it aside and you found Arthur’s long lost wizard – Merlin. 

Viviane: Lady of the Lake. You love her as a mother because she was always very good and kind to you – even though you don’t really understand her motives, neither the nature of her being. You just know she is magical. 

Seraide: she was always very kind to you and after you came to the court of Arthur, she served as a connection between you and Viviane. She is clever, witsfull, and she has been to you almost a second mother. 

Bors and Lionel: you like them as brothers – as the duty demands – yet you have no special relationship with them. You respect that Lionel is the oldest, therefore the new king of Benoic. 

Claudas: you understand he killed your father, but it doesn’t fill you with anger. And you don’t care for Benoic. But you are furious he tortured Elyzabel, Guinevere’s cousin. 

Arthur: your king, wise and mighty warrior. You admire him, love him, respect him, and it is killing you that you are betraying him by sleeping with Guinevere. 

Guinevere: she is your everything. You had killed for her. Sacrificed your friends. You love her more than your life. 

Dinadan: you have always liked him because he is funny and avoids conflicts. 

Elaine: ýou pity her because you cannot love her. But she is the mother of your son! You have some responsibilities!

Galahad: What a fine young man. And he is your son! How could you gave up upon raising him? Oh, gosh, he has to hate me you much. 

Gawain: you deeply regret you killed his brothers. 

Hector: a dear friend of yours, great knight. 

King Galeholts: your dear friend. He knows about your affair with Guinevere. 

Lady Malahaut: she used to love you, but then she married Galeholts. She was a good friend both to you and Guinevere.

Love and duty. That’s everything. But what comes first? Will be stronger your earthly desires which makes you a small man, or will your honor prevail and you will do what you must, even if it should cost you your happiness? 

1. You need to discover what Elaine wants. It would be great to find her a husband. What about Mordred? He is single. He served at the castle. Why? You should find out more about it. Maybe you can ask Gawain, or Morgana, his mother. 
2. You would love to discover what happened to Merlin. You know he disappeared when you came to the court. Could there be a connection? You should check with Viviana, or Seraide. 
3. You would love to reconnect with Galahad, your son. Explain to him you are sorry for leaving. It might be so hard. But you need to try!
4. If you could only run away with Guinevere. Maybe Galeholts could give both of you asylum. But would it completely ruin your name and your honor? 
5. You sympathize with Tristan’s love for Isolda. If you can protect them, you will. Who could help? Claudas, if you will support his claim for Benoic? Or would it be better to find a new woman for King Mark? Maybe Guinevere will know about someone. 
6. Your manly desires are great. You wish to meet with Guinevere in private and release them. But you cannot be seen!